The Futon Report

SportsByBrooks has this new morning feature called the “Speed Read,” and it’s worth mentioning that I’m going to be pitching in a couple times a week on it. Case in point: this morning. Looky.

The answer may surprise you! Or vomit. Take your pick.

(HT: My co-worker Ryan)

And it was growing right there in the ground. Eat more tofu!

Scientists who just happened to have large amounts of soy-based and sperm-based substances have determined that the more you eat of the former, the less you produce of the latter. (Please, please, please, do NOT get that backwards.) So basically lovers of tofu have less of a chance to procreate than your garden variety animal killer. Read more