Zach Randolph? How About No

By Matt Sussman | Jun 17, 2008 | Filed Under Basketball

zachrandolph.jpgA big trade involving the Detroit Pistons is imminent. Joe Dumars said so, and he’s never lied to me before. So who’s gonna show up? Carmelo Anthony? Tracy McGrady? Josh [gulp] Howard? The suspense is tantalizing! I feel like a Tigers fan when the team still had Cameron Maybin!

The Free Press (Detroit variety)’s columnist Drew Sharp thinks Zach Randolph would make a fine addition to the Detroit Pistons.

You mean this Zach Randolph?

I’m not even that fervent a Detroit Pistons fan and I don’t want Zach Randolph playing there. Or Cleveland. Or anywhere within a 500-mile radius of my hometown. In fact, I think we’ve stumbled on one of the first valid reasons that the NBA should expand to a European division.

Sharp contends:

The Pistons would be a good spot for Randolph, who’s still battling issues with immaturity. He’s not a leader. He remains a follower.

How is this a beneficial trait in basketball?

“Hello, Detroit Pistons. You should sign my client to a 5-year, hundredy-threeteen million dollar deal. He’s very skilled. Not really much of a leader though. You’ll have to tell him what to do. And make sure the instructions are written with brightly-colored pastel markers. Otherwise he’ll get distracted. And have you seen him dribble drive? No? Perfect.”

Switching gears to sensibility, Chad Ford outlines six good deals the Pistons could make, and most of them sadly involve trading away Tayshaun Prince, who has the most trade value since he’s the youngest of the Pistons’s veteran core. The Boozer-Brewer for Hamliton-Prince one looks really volatile, but it just might work. Of course, we’ve seen how other Detroit teams have shaken the dynamic of their teams recently. As long as the Pistons don’t try to trade for any pitchers from Florida, they’ll be okay.

BallHype: hype it up! Tags: , ,

Comments


Subscribe to this post's comments.

1 so far


  1. Joel on June 19, 2008 8:43 pm:

    Hilarious video. Loved it the first time I saw it, and this was a great refresher.

    The lesson, as always: Zach Randolph sucks.

Name (required)

Email (required)

Website

XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>

Share your wisdom


Stuff I didn't write, but that doesn't necessarily make it any worse

    DJ Gallo might have something here with his NFL weekly wrap article. ESPN

    Comments (0)

    Tatum Bell took off with Rudi Johnson’s luggage. Gain of two yards. Shutdown Corner

    Comments (0)

    TSN showed their Top Ten NFL plays from 2007. Two of them were Cleveland Browns plays. Josh Cribbs’ disaster-to-master return TD, and the one where the New York Jets forgot how to tackle Jamal Lewis.

    Comments (0)

    Now that David Eckstein is with the Diamondbacks, he’ll play second next to Adam Dunn at first. Eck actually called off Dunn on a pop fly, and Mark Grace on the FSN broadcast said it looked like a father-son game. AZ Republic

    Comments (0)

    If the rest of the synchronized swimming team really wanted to win the gold, they’d have all attempted to drown in solidarity. SI

    Comments (0)

    Announcer, during the Rangers-Tigers game: “Baseball is a game of inches. [pause] It’s also a game of Inges.” Gak. FSN Southwest

    Comments (0)

    UT hoops signs Emeka Okafor’s cousin … Emeka Okafor. This was done to make family reunions easier to gather everyone at the drop of a hat. Blade

    Comments (0)

    Barry Bonds isn’t retired. He’s just exploring his options. The Dugout

    Comments (0)

    So I’m watching some Olympic water polo match online (yes, I know) and it’s halftime. The song they picked? Why, the instrumental version of “Cotton-Eye Joe.” Not sure what’s more shocking. That they’re playing the instrumental version of “Cotton-Eye Joe,” or that someone made an instrumental version of “Cotton-Eye Joe.” Is this how all water polo matches go? NBCOlympics.com

    Comments (0)

    UT graduate Jerrah Young doubles Ireland’s black population by signing pro hoops contract with Cork’s UCC Demons. Xs and Mo’s

    Comments (0)
Despite its low center of gravity, you can still tip the Futon Report.