The Futon Report

Here’s a team that lost by double digits to FIU. No points against Ball State. And at one point, looked like they might not’ve been able to beat any other teams on their schedule, thus solidifying a one-win season and the ripping up of Tom Amstutz’s business cards.

But then:

Toledo 13, Michigan 10.

Is it okay, fellow BGSU fans, to enjoy this one? Why, yes. Yes it is.

Next week: Watch Toledo lose 61-13 to Central Michigan.

Eastern Michigan 24
Bowling Green 21

The worst part? I can’t make any goddamn EMU jokes for at least, like, a year.

I wonder what it’s like to play your main rival when it’s not the final game of the year. Sure, Toledo and Bowling Green weren’t always the last game, so it shouldn’t be too hard to fathom, but it’s still an odd feeling. When a team doesn’t mind going 1-11 as long as that one win is against the most loathed team, the wind really has to be taken out of a team’s sails if a 5-0 start is tarnished by a rival loss. Sadly, this must be how Kent State feels every year.

12 noon — Akron (2-3, 0-1) at Kent State (1-4,10-1) ◼ ESPN Game Plan
Seriously, why don’t they just buy a second wagon wheel so they can both have one?

2 p.m. — Ohio (1-4, 0-1) at WMU (4-1, 2-0) ◼ Seriously?
I keep forgetting Western Michigan is good. Maybe it’s better that way.

3:30 p.m. — Temple (1-4, 0-2) at Miami (1-3) ◼ ONN
Temple has upgraded from losing big to losing barely.

4 p.m. — EMU (1-4, 0-2) at BG (2-2) ◼ Wood County Camcorders
You know that intramural football team that felt really good about their chances at the beginning of the season, but then started playing games and got crushed, and in the middle of the season just wanted to quit? Well, I don’t know why I just thought of that as I looked at Eastern Michigan’s changes, but I did.

7 p.m. — Ball State (5-0, 2-0) at Toledo (1-3, 1-0) ◼ …or NOT
So Toledo kicks the bucket against FIU, and Ball State’s riding high. Of course UT pulls this off somehow. It’s goddamn conference play. That’s just how it goes.

7 p.m. — Northern Illinois (2-2) at Tennessee (1-3) ◼ Even Tennessee doesn’t care
What looked like a complete laugher three weeks ago has turned into a simple harmless blowout.

SportsByBrooks has this new morning feature called the “Speed Read,” and it’s worth mentioning that I’m going to be pitching in a couple times a week on it. Case in point: this morning. Looky.

Image by hail2thesuss via FlickrThe G…. Game of the Week? Between two 2-2 teams, an undefeated team trudging along after the horrific Dante Love collision, and WMU trying to improve to 4-1 against Temple, the televised/featured MAC Game of the Week is freaking Eastern Michigan and Northern Illinois? Sure, I know they probably determine these things before they suit up their laces, but how can even in July people in suits look at this game and say, “Yep, EMU and NIU will be the game to watch.” Just because a game ends 6-3 doesn’t mean it will be an exciting showdown between two evenly-matched teams. Gah.

12 noon — NIU (1-2, 0-1) at EMU (1-3, 0-1) ◼ ESPN Game Plan
To echo Norm McDonald, “Happy Birthday, Jesus! Hope you like crap!”

12 noon — Kent St. (1-3) at Ball St. (4-0) ◼ ESPN Game Plan
I still think the Cardinals have a real chance to go undefeated, even without the services of Dante Love. Perhaps they have even more incentive to run the table with their senior on the sidelines cheering them on.

2:00 p.m. — VMI (2-1) at Ohio (0-4) ◼ The hills (because, see, they have eyes)
Boo? Boo Jackson? Dark One? Beelzebub? Chief? McCloud!

2:00 p.m. — WMU (3-1, 1-0) at Temple (1-3, 0-1) ◼ Hell, the NSA has everything monitored, ask them for a copy
Could this be the first ever win for Temple over the Broncos? For the first time, consider it a solid “maybe.”

3:30 p.m. — Cincinnati (2-1) at Akron (2-2) ◼ FSN Ohio
Not a fair fight in football. Yet somehow a fair fight in baseball.

4:00 p.m. — Buffalo (2-2, 1-0) at CMU (2-2, 1-0) ◼ Alternate Dimension ESPN Game Plan
Suddenly CMU doesn’t look like the prohibitive favorite anymore, says Mark Torosian of the Bleacher Report. And out of nowhere … Buffalo kind of does. Ladies and gentlepeople, your Official Non-Official MAC Game of the Week.

4:00 p.m. — BG (1-2) at Wyoming (2-2) ◼ The Mountain
First Boise, Idaho. Now Laramie, Wyoming. If this is BG’s clever way of trying to become a West coast mid-major team, I’m not impressed.

7:00 p.m. — Florida Int’l (0-3) at Toledo (1-2) ◼ BCSN
Glass Bowl, meet Ned. Ned, Glass Bowl.